Calhouns Can(n)ons

Call Your Insurance Agent! It’s The CSD Elections

The Tribune reports that candidates standing for the two seats for the Los Osos CSD are David B. Dugan, Maria Kelly, Marshall E. Ochyliski, Alon Perlman and Karen Vendetti. (Both Kelly and Vendetti are presently serving on the TAC)

I commend them for their courage and urge the winners to immediately hoik themselves down to their local insurance agent to take out a HUGE umbrella policy to guard themselves from being sued PERSONALLY by whoever claims to be a “member” of the Medean Taxpayers Watch. And I would urge them as their first vote in office, to make sure the District has lawsuit insurance for Board members in place as well.

Over at the Bay News,( www.tolosapress.com ) is Jack Beardwood’s story that “Tacker and Schicker Will Not Run Again,” in which CSD Board member Schicker states that she felt that, "the CSD would benefit by having a new ‘energized’ person on the board” and added, “I’m lucky I’m still alive, to tell you the truth.”

I’ll say. Here in MedeaVille, it’s a miracle ANYONE would stand for ANY office. So my hat’s off to those who have.

Also in Beardwood’s story, an interesting observation by CSD Boardmember Tacker that the CSD is dysfunctional, “it is being kept alive by the County and LAFCo[the Local Agency Formation Commission] to keep attorneys paid. The CSD is a buffer from litigation on the county. The contractors believe if the CSD is abolished they can sue the county. To keep the country free of the Tri-W debt is why we’re still alive.

“Asked if the CSD should be abolished, she replied, ‘I wonder why it’s in existence. I ask the question, ‘Is this our purpose to continue to pay the attorneys and continue to fight the Battle of Taxpayers Watch? Or is it our job to provide real services to the community at a reasonable cost?”

Ah, good questions all and one of the reasons I think we need a Truth & Reconciliation Hearing – civil and criminal liability immunity for all who tell the truth, instant court and jail time for those who lie – at which we may finally get a chance to find out just what happened to this community. Subpoena power for this hearing would go all the way to the Water Board in Sacramento to get some folks up there to ‘splain some emails, among other things. The hearing would be long but very, very interesting.

Meantime, we’ll just have to settle for CSD attorneys defending the community from Medea & Her Brood.

At any rate, good luck to the candidates and thank you for standing for election.

Speaking of ‘Splaining . . .

The Aug 14th Trib and again the editorial of the 15th concerned an ATV bill that would require parents to supervise kids under 16 while riding on Oceano Dunes in various off-road vehicles. Seems Doctors among others are getting sick of seeing kids coming into their emergency rooms with horrendous injuries caused by careless, inexperienced, poorly supervised and trained kids crashing out in the Dunes. You know, kids often so severely injured and whose parents may well have no insurance so the TAXPAYERS get to pick up the bill?

Anyway, this ATV Bill, which, of course, died in some committee, where most bills go to quietly die, was shot down, in part, because the State Parks folks estimated “it would cost between $9 million and $12 million [of tax money] to implement, with the biggest chunk of that going to train young riders [for free] who don’t already have safety certificates.”

??? The state has to cough up money to “train young riders who don’t already have safety certificates?”

When did it happen that if I want to get a drivers license, the STATE paid for my driving lessons? Was I not looking when that law passed? So what’s with this? The State has to pay to train young kids on ATV safety before they can drive off in a State Park and kill themselves and each other? What?

I have a modest alternative proposal: Go to the Oceano Dunes. If you own your own ATV equipment, before you get on the dunes you present the ranger at the entrance kiosk your certificate of proficiency (ATV operator’s license) and proof of medical insurance (just like you present your drivers license and proof of insurance when stopped by the police). If you rent the ATVs there, present same to the person running the rental business. No operator’s license, no proof of medical insurance, no ATV’s allowed in the park and if you’re caught riding on the dunes without same, great big massive fine and confiscation (just like is done if you’re driving around with no license and insurance.).

Ditto for any and all kids in the family. Kid has no certificate, no insurance, parents go to jail for endangering a minor. Or, better yet, jail time for child abuse.

And where to these folks get their operator safety ATV certification? Same place I have to go to learn to drive – Driving School, paid for out of my own pocket.

So, I don’t understand why this bill failed and what or why the State thinks it has to pay to safety train these kids. Let’s hope Maldonado, the bill’s sponsor, “who quietly withdrew it after he learned about the cost,” will rethink this.

Leeettttt the Sun Shine, Letttt the Sun Shine In . . . .

The Tribune, 8/15 again, notes: PG&E to buy power from 2 solar farms.” And the New Times (8/14--21) ,” Local Students may get a chance to study solar technology.”

Woa, nice lurch into the 21st century. PG&E has “entered into agreements to purchase 800 megawatts of power from two solar plants to be built on the Carizo Plain,” while “Atascadero Unified School district looks at partnering with solar firms,” to set up a training program that could lead to “. . . a lot of jobs, green collar jobs. I think we need to prepare our students to get into those jobs. It’s a growing industry and one we can’t ignore,” says George Galvan, trustee, Atascadero School Board.

Amen. Nice move. Now if the Sate and Feds can get moving on both power grids and systems and law changes that would allow homeowners to participate in making and selling electricity to that grid, we can start calling some of those Green Atascadero Graduates to come put solar panels on our homes so we can chug off into our Brave New World.

Karma Times Ten. OMG! I Take It All Back , Maybe

Few days ago I reported feeling a distinct schaden-freudenish glee at the plight Ed McMahon was in – house in foreclosure – because I thought it was karmic retribution for all the years he promised me millions pitching for the Publishers Clearing House and all the while giving MY nice money to other people.

Now comes the hideous headline in the Times: “Trump lends helping wallet to McMahon.” The Donald wants to buy Ed’s house and lease it back to him. Can you imagine The Donald as your landlord, comb-over shellacked in place, bursting into your house every month screeching, My Rent! You’re Fired! Gimme Rent! And pursing his guppy lips at you, pbloik-pbloik . . .month after month after month? Gaaagghhhh, it’s a karmic fate worse than death. Even Ed McMahon deserves better.

On the other hand, the Times story does go on to say that McMahon had listed his house for “more than $7 million but [it] dropped in increments, winding up this weekend at $4.6 million. McMahon purchased the house in 1990 for $2.6 million, according to public records."

Hmmm, let’s see. In a country seeing people literally being put out on the street, with people losing their jobs and homes, I buy a house for $2.6 and have to sell it in a distress, fire-sale type deal for $4.6 and walk away with $2 million smackaroonies.

Aw, Poor me.

On second thought, Landlord Trump may be karmic justice after all.

And finally, the Long View

When all seems so grim and scary, there’s a story by Randolph Schmid, AP, about skeletons uncovered in the shifting sands of the Sahara, of bodies buried when the Sahara was green and lush and strange creatures roamed the plains and forests and two sets of prehistoric people lived and died and were buried by those who loved them amidst flowers and jewelry and other treasured artifacts. Most touching of which was a woman buried with two young children, their skeleton fingers still entwined.

The bones being uncovered are of two distinct races of people living in the same general area thousands of years apart. The Kiffian peoples were tall (often well over 6’) hunter- fishermen. And thousands of years later, a shorter, slighter people, the Tenerians, appeared and had apparently added cattle herding to their hunting/gathering lifestyle.

Soon, time and weather erased all traces of their existence as the green Sahara turned into the desert we know today. And under the earth, the bodies lay until wind and time blew the sand away and like time travelers, they appeared once again to touch us lightly on our own shoulders – whispered reminders – as we were and are now, so shall you be.

Another reminder of how short our lives are, how fragile and fleeting history and memory are, yet these ancient’s all too human care and love for one another remains the timeless message.

A Note

Life is the only way
to get covered in leaves,
catch your breath on the sand, rise on wings;

to be a dog,
or stroke its warm fur,

to tell pain
from everything it’s not’

to squeeze inside events,
dawdle in views,
to seek the least of all possible mistakes.

An extraordinary chance
to remember for a moment
a conversation held
with the lamp switch off’

and if only once
to stumble on a stone,
end up soaked in one downpour or another,

mislay your keys in the grass’
and to follow a spark on the wind with your eyes’

and to keep on not knowing
something important


--Wislawa Symborska