Put a mortuary in next door, and there you'd have it!
Reason # 2938289301 Why I Love Los Osos.
Sunday, October 04, 2009
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Calhouns Can(n)ons
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Calhoun's Can(n)ons was originally published in 1990 in the (now defunct) Morro Bay, CA, Sun Bulletin, and since 1992 has continued in the various resurrections of the Los Osos, CA. Bay News, Bay Breeze, Bay News, Bay News-Tolosa Press. A few years ago, the Can(n)on was added to the Central Coast NewsMission blogsite. Ann Calhoun lives in Los Osos. You can email her at Churadogs at gmail dot com
To be persuasive, we must be believable. To be believable, we must be credible. To be credible, we must be truthful.
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The Little Prince
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It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; the essential is invisible to the eye.
Antoine de Saint-Exupery
The Little Prince
No one is exempt from talking nonsense; the misfortune is to do it solemnly.
Montaigne
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15 comments:
LCA
Substance use or abuse it all ends up in the water.
Tobakki predates Birch Bark as one of the Original Natural medicines and cuh, excuse me, hack aaa-hurk ahuk ahuk, oh, just, cah-haoo, uhh.
I'll get back to this later.
Maybe someone should paint an arrow on the sidewalk pointing right to left.
What isn't shown in the picture is the Subway to the right of the smoke shop.
In chronological order:
First, if you need to pick up your prescription, there's the Medicine Shoppe. To add to the decline of your personal health, grab a few smokes at the Smoke Shop. And when on your deathbed -- suffering from emphysema -- and you want that mediocre sub taste, force your loved ones to Subway and have them order a sandwich that has enough calories to make Jared cry.
Los Osos is comedy, the dark kind of comedy.
A propos today's blog entry... intriguing commentary at http://committedparent.wordpress.com/
From left to right, Government supported megapharma, bilking the people, next, government supported recreational drug use, bilking the people,next goverment supported big business, part time bilking. next (around the corner) government supported land speculation, bilking the people, next, government owned communications...........
Is this a great country, or what?
Yup, great country. Now, if we were an HONEST country we'd have a law saying you could only sell tobacco and alcohol in a DRUG STORE.
No, If we were honest, drugs, all of them, would be available over the counter at the department store, along with the tobacco and alcohol.
Can you imagine getting a prescription filled for a sixer of Bud?
Sir, may I have your copay card for that beer? What? No insurance? That'll be fifty dollars please.
You fogot to include food...
Mike Green sez:"Sir, may I have your copay card for that beer? What? No insurance? That'll be fifty dollars please."
Actually, that would be wonderful because it might finally get people to understand that booze and tabacckie ARE DRUGS. Right now we pretend they're not "drugs," or at least not one of those "dangerous drugs," like pot or cocaine, even though the kill-rate (sans pot) for alcohol/tabacckie is about a bazillion times higher than those awful "dangerous drugs" + prescription abuse drugs." Maybe then we could think more clearly about "drugs" and our "drug policy" and come up with something saner (and more honest) than we have now.
All in favor of completely forgetting the lessons learned with prohibition would applaud that position Ann.
Honest folks on the other hand just might be able to regulate themselves without the hand wringing false idea that drugs are regulated for our own good.
They are regulated to protect the profits of meagapharma, plain and simple.
You do realize that aspirin would need a prescription if it had been developed today?
And don't go getting on beers case, beer (in some form) is most likely the basis for civilization as we know it, the earliest settlements found so far that have agrarian evidence all have some form of brewery.
Darnit Mikki-G, You beat me to the punchline, again.
And I had such a nice calhouns cannons pre-posting buzz going. (See next posting -Addiction)
Also Al Cap-one and the rise of organized crime, what do you have against american entrprnurship?
(a couple of extra "E"s were left out on the assembly of that last word.. Here they are [e] [e])
I waz gonna post-
"WMark You should know this- I remember it almost like it was yestiday, right in the shadow of the pyramid, the other two wern't built yet, we unseeled the clay Jar and there it was-BOZA, still with clumps of soggy bread under the foam of fermentation. A hint of smell of Nile Narcisus from the honey. oh me and Khofu, (Khofu and I? Real men dont use proper grammer) oh we got so silly we started a fight with the nubians, then we made up with them by opening another Jar, then another. Rising Sirius smiled at the sight of all of us passed out snoring.
You totally harshed my buzz dude.
But no hard feelings.
I've got a baggie of Birch bark shavings for ya. It's Oregons Best (see next post.) hold it up to the light -You can see the Salysilic Acid chrystals right there on the bag.
(Or is Silly -Sally, I had to synthesise it for organic chem at Cal. and I get flashbacks of senioritis googling for stuff I almost learned in California's finest higher education institutions..)
It's ASPIRIN, if ther are any of you Hitites reading this.
Left over Comment to WMark- So you see, from Mike Greens comment- BEER Is FOOD
Yeh Ann, alias Churadogs, CD or DC (for you know you are my current D.O.C-(Drug of Choice))
Drugs with Potent Central Nervous system affects
And somewhere I read/saw-on-telly/heard that nicotine while not as stimulating to the pedal depressed pleasure center as Heroin/smack/horse and...
(Sounds offstage;
Tromp tromp tromp, patio door creaks,
Flick flick, drawww, pause, AAAhhhhh. Puff puff
Three minutes elapse.
stub, creee-ak, tromp tromp tromp.)
...and sister Coca-in de Mele-in. Nicotine has exceptional ADDICTIVE
Properties that place it in a class of its own, or at least in the front row of the class.
And Alcohol, that happy making central nervous system depressant, has Genetic AND Behavioral inheritances, And interacts with the Serotonin receptors in the Third eye in the middle of the head.
(No, the OTHER third Eye, ...wrong head, sheesh, really...)
So in Northern latitudes, in the winter, Alcohol makes people SAD-der. (As in; Seasonal Affective Disorder-der)
In combination with genetic pre-disposition, family life effects, Isolation, cold, it’s a SIXER, of bad karma.
Choose your latitudes carefully, Choose your parents more carefully, yet.
I named the combined syndromes, the "Wood Keepers Son Syndrome" ("WooKeeSS") and have published on it extensively, in the peer reviewed, "International Journal of Al-Be-Normal Behavior." and also in the NIH Pamphlet “Admixing Psychotropic medications with Alcohol and the affect on SewerCidal Tendencies”
Recommended reading “Sometimes a great notion (Democracy, that is)” by the author of “One flew over the Coocoo nest, (then landed in Los Osos)”.
By Ken Ceasy, one of the first participants in Halprin’s Lysergic S(?) Di-amino acid experiments at Stanford University (Booo, Hiss…)
Word verifiation: osicial
Mike Green sez:"All in favor of completely forgetting the lessons learned with prohibition would applaud that position Ann."
You've (all apparently) made the false presumption that because something's in a DRUG STORE you need a prescription for it. That's not my argument. I'm saying we get a sane drug policy (gotta be over 21 for starts) and we should put drugs in a properly labeled DRUG STORE so people could go in to get their poison OTC but couldn't pretend, for example, that alcohol is not a dangerous drug but just a harmless "food" since they bought it in a grocery store.
In this country we've labeled really dangerous drugs (tobaccy & alcohol) as socially o.k. -- can't celebrate New Year's Eve without a Drug In A Glass, doncha know -- while labeling and making illegal, relatively harmless (pot) and quantitatively/numerically (but often more horrificly debilitating, i.e. meth, coke) or relatively "maintable" (heroine) drugs as "dangerous." Time to label drugs. . . well, drugs . . then maybe we can rank them more honestly and deal honestly with the social/medical effects of these drugs and come up with a saner way of dealing with them and the people who use and abuse them.
Uh, Ann,
"You've (all apparently) made the false presumption that because something's in a DRUG STORE you need a prescription for it. That's not my argument".
After posting;
"Sir, may I have your copay card for that beer? What? No insurance? That'll be fifty dollars please."
Actually, that would be wonderful because it might finally get people to understand that booze and tabacckie ARE DRUGS."
Ya, can't see how we made THAT presumption, he he.
OK. Drug stores without prescriptions, I'm OK with that.
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