O.K. Poly Dollies, We Gotta Reeeeely, Reeeely Talk

O.K. Girls and Boys, pay attention to Mother Calhoun. The Tribune yesterday had further details on one recent Cal Poly rape case that indicates how badly things can go south. The young “victim” in this case reported to police that she went to a frat party at 11 pm, scarfed down a dozen shots of Jagermeister liquor and a shot of some other kind of booze. She cannot recall what happened after about 1:30 a.m.. She wakes up in some kind of pain and, as the Tribune notes, “believed she’d been raped.” Police go to the frat house and find her panties “hanging from a palm tree in the courtyard.”

A few days later, a guy called “Joe” called her to see how she’s doing and the police set a phone trap and record the calls, the jist of which is these two young idiots were drunk and had some kind of sex and at this point in the story, it’s not at all clear whether the victim herself can remember what the hell she did or didn’t do or when she did or didn’t pass out. And “Joe,” also drunk, concluded that when the young woman took him aside and said “let’s do it” and got herself undressed, he foolishly thought that implied consent.

And being a drunk young 23 year-old male at a frat party nuzzling up a drunk cute young woman, he went along with that implied consent and ended up with his face and name all over the front page of the local paper and the word “rapist” stuck next to it because the young woman in question “believed” she’d been raped. And even if this particular case is dropped, the rapist brand will stick to “Joe” forever in the world of Google. Even years from now when “Joe” is a successful professional and is perhaps being considered for a job promotion that involves an extensive security background search. Well, you get that picture, don’t you?

And the drunk young woman in question who can’t explain how her panties got up that palm tree? A police report is filed. Just because the newspapers don’t print “victims” names, she’s undoubtedly going to end up immortalized in Google and/or Facebook as well since nowadays, nothing seems to remain a secret for long. And years from now, when she’s being considered for a job promotion involving an extensive security background check?

THAT’s what 12 shots of Jaegermeister will get you in a world where the law can be used as a blunt instrument in dealing with the incredibly complex and fraught world of human sexuality. That's where our politically correct inclinations and our desire to level a playing field in a distinctly unfair natural world and our unwillingness to honestly deal with our complicated and often hidden sexual selves will lead: two lives publicly derailed with consequences that may last a lifetime.

If drunk young boys and girls are going to do what drunk young boys and girls will do, surely there has got to be a better way to handle these cases? Better definitions of just what constitutes “rape” in a real world where random hook-ups by total strangers apparently are the norm? Or even some better way to hold both parties fairly accountable for the crime of walking while stupid?.

Or perhaps in cases like this, we should make it legal to redact both parties’ names until indictments come down. That would be better than what happened to these two idiots that resulted in “Joe” branded forever as a rapist on a “belief” by a drunk young woman who didn’t know how her panties got up that palm tree.

Speaking of Walking While Stupid

Here’s the truly amazing thing about the Congressman Weiner’s wiener. Our political landscape has been turned into a killing ground: No quarter given. It’s swarming with political operatives constantly searching for any chink in anyone’s armor, a relentless 24/7 stake-out using the most sophisticated sneak & peep tools, including hacking and purloined emails. In short, if you’re a Pol you KNOW that there’s a whole army of operatives just gunning for you and that anything and anyone is fair game.

Yet there’s Weiner sexting away with perfect strangers who lose no time contacting various bloggers and networks in order to cash in and get their 15 minutes of fame. In today’s political world, in today’s Facebook, YouTube world, there are no confidences: everybody will sell out everybody else for that 15-minute spotlight.

Yet Weiner still sends dirty pictures and has phone sex with complete strangers? All of which tells me that (1) he can’t help himself, which means (2) he’s out of control, which means he’s (3)unstable and heading for a crash & burn. OR, it means (1) he thinks he’s untouchable and above the Laws of Consequences that govern the rest of us, which means(2) he’s seriously out of touch with reality, which means(3) he’s unstable and heading for a crash & burn.

Which he did.

Two stories, both sad as hell train wrecks for the participants, and likely funny as hell to the passersby. And both stories as old as the hills. As Willa Cather noted, “There are only two or three human stories, and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely as if they had never happened before.”

Which is why the price of stock in Kleenex will never drop.