Aw Dang! I wanted President Obama to veto the Keystone XL pipeline bill so I could see Senator Mitch McConnell's head explode. But Congress beat me to it; the Senate defeated the bill . . . for now. Dang!
Then I wanted President Obama to issue his executive order on immigration so I could watch John Boehner's head explode, but I guess I'll have a wait a bit for that. Maybe that will happen in time for Christmas. What a present!
Of course, the immigration thing will also cause Senator Ted Cruz's head to explode, after which he'll start impeachment proceedings, which will cause all the Democrats' heads to explode. Which is going to make the floors in Congress pretty messy, and that's why I'm now heavily investing in several major cleaning service businesses.
I'll also have to wait for the Supreme Court to rule on the health care issue. I want them to rule so that Obamacare can be totally dismantled so "Freeeeedom!" will prevail and all those millions of people who now have health care will lose it. And everyone else can return to the good old days when they could be denied coverage for pre-existing conditions, or be tossed off their insurance when their illnesses got too expensive, or go bankrupt when they got ill. Since "everybody" hates Obamacare (except those who actually have it; most of them are satisfied with their coverage) I say, get rid of it and make the insurance companies very happy. Then everyone can return to harping about how awful our medical care system is while doing nothing about fixing it. And we can go back to choosing between buying food or paying for our medicines. Like God intended.
Once the Republicans take over both houses of Congress in January, I'm hoping all regulations and restrictions on gas, coal, oil are lifted (More Freeeeedom!) and we start burning every last bit of it -- especially that really, really dirty tar sand oil that the XL pipeline will be bringing across America to be sold overseas. I also want lots of oil spills from that pipeline. Oil spills are job creators!
And I want us to bring back the SUV! We need to drive more! It's Burn, America, Burn. And I want every nation on earth (especially China and India) do the same. The bigger the burn, the faster the weather will change. And I want the weather to change because the sooner it does, the sooner Senator Jim Inhofe's beloved state (Oklahoma) will be wiped off the face of the earth by super tornadoes generated by Global Warming (which he doesn't believe in) and so I want to see if, standing amidst the rubble, he finally "gets it" and that causes his head to explode.
Right now, polar bear numbers are dropping by 40%. We've got to do better than that, people. There's oil under that ice so the quicker we get rid of the ice, the quicker we can get to that oil. It's a matter of national security now because we'll soon be fighting global Resource Wars -- food, water, energy, governmental collapse, massive immigration, disease -- so we'll need all the oil we can get.
Otherwise all our heads will explode and the only thing that will be left on our self-destroyed planet will be cockroaches and dead-battery iPhones.